Two and a Half Men, Second Episode Sucked as well.

I wasn't surprised that the second episode left me feeling just as empty as the season premiere did.  I am still not buying this Walden character and I think that the story line they came up with is just ridiculous!!  Walden is Kelso and again, The 70's Show is over.  This dip shit even let Alan stay with him til he gets on his feet, sound familiar??  They already did that when he came to stay with Charlie to begin with, come on CBS, your writers need something a little more original than that.  I am so disappointed.  I keep wanting to watch just hoping that it's all a bad dream and Charlie is gonna walk in from escaping Rose's dungeon in London.  I still say Rose would have never killed him.  Not for a second do I believe that.  Now Alan and Jake are just going to live with Kelso like nothing happened??  I call bullshit, it will never work and it will never be as funny as it was with Charlie Sheen.  Give him a break and let him come back, Ashton isn't cutting it.  Charlie! Charlie! Charlie!  Bring his winning ass back, no one cares that he is crazy.  Hell, were all a little crazy.

I will not Take out my piercings or hide my tattoos for a job, EVER!!!

I believe in our rights and one by one they are being taken away.  They are small changes that the government thinks we won't notice, but people are starting to see things differently.  I am an educated person, I would consider myself to be smart and even an asset to any job that I may have at the moment.  Not to sound full of myself by any means but everyone I work with usually likes me, the customers have always really liked me and I am super friendly and helpful to the customers.  My last job was managing a restaurant at night and I was pretty damn good at it, I thought.  We had to close when the economy went to shit in 2008 and it was a really tough time for me.  I had to take my piercing out when I came to work (or wear a band-aid over my eyebrow.)  I only had one visible tattoo so it was ok.  I currently work at a Tobacco store and luckily they don't give a shit.  I now have 8 tattoos (with more to come) and 5 are highly visible and 3 facial piercings in cute places not tacky ones.  I have a small eyebrow piercing, my lip and my Marilyn.  They are very fitting to my face and I enjoy them, it's just fucking jewelry.  It just may not be in a spot that is considered "the norm".  I never claimed to be normal.  Normal is boring.  It's my right to express myself and I will not sacrifice my beliefs for some job that obviously doesn't want a real person employed there.  I stand up for what I believe in no matter how small it may seem to some people.  I even had a job offer recently making a lot more money than I make now but I turned it down because I will not change who I am to appease a boss.  My work ethic should be enough.  If you are not true to yourself, you're fooling no one but you.

If You're Healthy, Your Farts DON'T Smell.

Just saying.  Look it up.....

Two and a Half Men Season Premiere with Ashton SUCKED!!

I had my ideas of how the show would go and how they would introduce Ashton into the mix, I was not only wrong but extremely disappointed.  It was as if they were having a Charlie Sheen funeral, not a Charlie Harper funeral.  It slammed Charlie Sheen in my opinion.  It was very distasteful and not in the usual funny as shit Two and a Half Men kind of way.
 Rose killed him?  Come on.... puh-leeeeze!!!  She was in love with him, yeah she may have fucked with him a few times, like when she glued his nuts to his leg but she would never have killed him.  Come on CBS, be more believable damn.  Rose said on many occasions that she loved Charlie for who he was, well he was a womanizing sleaze.  She would not have killed him, period!!  Even if she did find him in the shower with another woman.
Ashton's character made no sense, he was awkward and goofy and reminded me of a really bad version of Kelso from The 70's Show.  I really have no idea where the show is gonna go with this but if they had any damn sense they would bring Charlie back.  They had a closed casket, maybe he wasn't there.  Rose has him in a dungeon in London for punishment...... he should escape and come back.
QUICKLY PLEASE

I Want to Write a Book.

Everyone tells me that I should write a book.  I'm sure they are just being polite.  I did okay in my writing classes but damn that's a huge task, that's why I blog.... short and sweet!  I wouldn't know where to begin.  My life has been a crazy string of events but whose hasn't?  Why am I any different?  In that case, we should all write books.  Wouldn't that be neat to get to read everyone else's story?  My story is a little different.  We shall see  how the cookie crumbles.  I have always wanted to write a book on survival skills of the normal fucked up person.   I have plenty, that's for sure.   Maybe I will one day and hopefully it will help another person.... just one,  and that will be fine by me.  

Some of My Favorite Quotes.

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them."
--Mother Teresa

"Before I met my husband, I'd never really fallen in love, I'd stepped in it a few times."
--Rita Rudner

"I have never killed a man but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."
--Clarence Darrow

"Can miles truly separate you from friends?... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there."
--Richard Bach

"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous."
--Ingrid Bergman

"Expressing anger is a form of public littering."
--Willard Gaylin

"It requires wisdom to understand wisdom:  the music is nothing if the audience is deaf."
--Walter Lippmann

"Clocks slay time... time is dead as long as it is being clicked off by little wheels; only when the clock stops, does time come to life."
--William Faulkner

"Suicide is mans way of telling God, you can't fire me, I quit."
--Bill Maher

"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured."
--Mark Twain

Independent Movies on Netflix Rock!!

Netflix is awesome, that has already been established.  Except for their recent price hike, on a random note.... why the hell do they call it a price hike?  What the fuck does that even mean?  Besides, they didn't have a hike, it was more like an tour.  I'm still a little bitter as you can tell.  Asshole Netflix.

On a positive note, (yes I have those on occasion) I absolutely fell in love with the independent movie section.  Sometimes the actors are not well known but the story-line and characters are just fucking amazing.   I have found quite a few with big time actors in them as well and they are bad ass.   I guess since they spend less cash on advertising and paying 10 fucking million dollars per money grubbing, tight ass actor will save a lot of money and then they must take all the money they saved from the greed and they make this fucking wonderful movie that's way better than half of the crap I've seen on the big screen.  Wow, if I remembered anything from english class in school..... that was a run-on sentence from hell!!  :)  

I'm so sick of these Skinny Ass Models. Real People Don't look like that!!

Every-time I see a commercial or magazine ad for clothing and see these skinny ass bitches, it just makes me sick. I think our society is way to focused on looks and body image.  I mean what right does anyone have to judge who is the correct size or shape to be worthy of being in a magazine ad or commercials?  Whoever decides that really needs to think about their target audience.  Hurting one groups feelings to sell something to another group seems kinda fucked up to me.  When I go around my town and others, I see people of all sizes.  Now they are real.  I want to see authentic members of the general public in the magazines I buy, not the plastic nonexistent dolls I see that they are trying to pass off as humans.  Real people with real features don't look like that at all.  Honestly the women in the magazines all look the same to me, I long for variety in pictures of people. The human face is the one thing you can take a picture of over and over again and it stays the same, yet it's always captured different.  It's the little amazing things that keep me happy.  Well I have rambled off subject again, imagine that??  Me??  Never!!  :)
On that note, I'm out!!
Peace.

It's okay to be Married and Not Want Kids!!

For starters I never thought that I would get married but I met an awesome man that shares the same views and morals as I and we hit it off perfectly.  He is my best friend!!  We both agree that we do not want children.... Ever!!  We are in our thirties and we have a family.  Each other.  We also have 3 dogs and 5 cats that we consider our children and that is enough for us.  We enjoy our time together and maybe some people might think that it's selfish but I don't really give a fuck.   I see it as the exact oppisite..... If our broke asses  had a kid, that child would grow up the same way that we did.   Neither one of us had the best childhood and we both grew up really poor.   I would never wish that life upon anyone, especially my child.  We made a selfless decision to not ruin another persons life. I like kids, I think they are adorable little creatures.  Some people aren't meant to be parents and that is totally alright.  Totally!!

 I love my friends kids, I think they are great, because they are not mine, I am not responsible for them.  Besides I have the patience of a ten year old so that would be a major problem.  On that note, I think I will have a beer (or 8) because I can.  Then the husband will come home from work and we will have sex somewhere crazy and then cuddle on the couch til bedtime while watching R rated movies with lots of cussing.  ;)
  It's the life I always wanted, I'm just so lucky that I found my dream guy.  Kudos to all the mothers out there that I know.  I honestly don't see how you do it.  I admire you and say....better you than me!!  :)

My Father Gave Me a Name...... Then he Walked Away.

Since I seem to be on this streak of putting myself out there and maybe letting some walls down in the process.  I don't know what the fuck I am doing, I guess I just wanna keep it real and maybe it will give some understanding as to the way I act sometimes.  Or help someone else that may have went through the same thing.   I'm a work in process for sure.

      My Father left our family when I was four years old so I don't really remember it, I just knew he was gone. Fast forward a few years and he remarries a much younger woman and had two other children during this time.  It's really too long of a story for this so I'm giving you the short version.  I have had no real contact with my father since I was six years old, his choice, not mine.  My mother never talked bad about him and always let me make my own decisions about seeing him.  He made them for me, he didn't want to see me.  He had a replacement family and he was/is a good father to them.  I never understood why I wasn't good enough to be his daughter but his other kids were??  It was very confusing growing up.   When they were younger I would visit my grandmother (fathers mom) on the weekends and they would be at her house as well.... I always considered them to be my brother and sister, no half, no labels, just brother and sister, with pride even.  I wiped my brothers ass and took him to the park but most importantly,  I loved him.
 My sister was just a baby, she didn't know anything was off, she knew I was her sister but I just didn't live with them.  She was the cutest little girl with chubby cheeks and a love for Barbie dolls.  We had a lot of fun playing dress up and hide and seek.  I wish I would have gotten to know her better before I pulled my stunt.

My stunt:  When I was 16 I decided I knew everything and I wanted someone to blame, someone to punish, to feel what I felt.  All the years of being poor and barely getting by while watching my father provide for his family and I was in hand me down pants that were still too big.  Seeing my mother suffer and cry, wondering how she was going to feed us.  I couldn't sit back and be fake while I felt like an outcast, so I basically disowned my family (fathers side) and stopped talking to everyone but my grandmother, we moved to a new town so my mom could go to college and I never looked back.   My brother was 10 at the time and my little sister was 5 or 6.  She doesn't remember me being around when she was younger but I sure do. My brother and I were really close, we used to build forts and play with Ninja Turtles and watch the damn Ghost-busters movies he was addicted to.  I thought I was a good sister but I guess I ended up unintentionally punishing him for my father (our father) being a prick. Crazy thing is, he is a good father to them.  It hurts me and makes me wonder why I am not good enough to be his child, what did I ever do?  I was just a little girl who loved her daddy and then he was gone.  I'll probably never be completely over the hurt that was caused but I have learned to accept everything.

Fast forward once again to 2008, my grandmother passed away and my brother promised her that he would find me and make things right.  Well he showed up on my doorstep after not seeing him for 10+ years and we went to lunch and talked and I really hoped to be a part of his family.  Unfortunantly that's exactly what is was..... his family.  I went to his hometown to visit and we attended my grandmothers funeral together.  I went right up to my father and hugged him, I even told him that I forgave him.  I spent some time with him, my step mom, and my brother and sister.  I thought finally I was part of something but it was never my something to be a part of.  My brother and I remained in contact for a year or so with visits and all.  He helped me get some parts for my car, he did brother things, it was nice to have him around.  I always wanted a brother,  so for about 2 years we were family, or so I thought.

I lost my job and was getting unemployment benefits and during a phone conversation we got into an argument about something that I don't even remember now and he basically made me feel like shit for being on government assistance, which led to some harsh words about how I wasn't given everything growing up like he was and he would never understand what's it's like to hurt for money or get evicted because you can't pay your rent.  He had a dad to give him guidance, advice and support.  How dare he judge me, he has no clue!!  Well that was the last time we talked and I have no intentions of ever speaking to him again.  He can never right all the wrongs.  It hurts but I did what is best for everyone.  My sister and brother may not get it now but one day when all the truths come out, they will understand why I did what I did.  If they have any sense, they will thank me for not ruining their fake little world they have created.   I feel so much better now getting that out.... whew, finally.

Job Not Sucking as Bad. (entry 4)

Well I had a meltdown and quit my job.  I wasn't thinking and I let some assholes get the best of me, totally not my usual fuck you self.  This customer basically lied and said she gave me a $20, when she clearly gave me a $10.  I ALWAYS put the money on top of the register until the change is COUNTED back, then I place it in it's  proper slot in the drawer.  This snaggld toothed hag came in 5 minutes later saying I stole her money.  WTF?  I am only one lonely cashier and I had a line so I expressed my thoughts of her being a liar and I gave her a ten dollar bill.  After it slowed down a bit, I counted my money and I was $10 short..... Imagine that.  It just got the best of me that day and I let those assholes beat me.  It own't happen again, I am stronger than that.  I am ashamed of how far I let them push me and so lucky that my boss is so fucking cool.  she let me cool off and she called me two days later and asked me to come back.  She encouraged me to be better than them douche bags and fuck what they think.  So things are going better, for now.  I don't work that many hours so that helps.  ;)
As you know..... I'll keep ya posted on my crap job and asshole customers.  Stay tuned. lol.

MTV'S VMA'S 2011 WTF Rundown.

I didn't watch the entire Video Music Awards this year, at least not yet.  You know they'll replay it on MTV for at least 2 fucking months, they always do.  What I did see though.... What the hell is happening?  Lady Gaga was a dude, a really ugly dude at that.  I mean I love Lady Gaga and I love her crazy, don't give a shit attitude.   She played the dude part well, too well.  She stayed in character all night so I'll give her major credit.  Anyway and Beyonce is pregnant and still rocking it out.  She is amazing and I am pretty sure she is a robot.  Kayne didn't eject anyone from the stage this year but from what I saw, was he ever even up on stage??  Did he win anything?  Don't get me started on Justin Beiber or Canadian poster child for miniature assholes, whatever you wanna call him, her, it, whatever.... he looked like the kid from Harry Potter, ya know Harry Potter.  He beat out Eminem??  I demand a recount.  Seriously?  Brittany Spears wore a cute little black dress and looked healthy.  She deserved her awards and I'm glad she's made such a comeback.  She's come a long way!  Go Brittany!   I loved the mini Brittany Brigade that were reliving her best video costumes and  moves, that was pretty cool.  The speech Russell Brand gave about Amy Winehouse was beautiful and I loved the footage of her and Tony Bennett working together.  I guess I never noticed how gorgeous she was, I feel bad for that.  The whole thing was very well put together and thoughtful!  Her voice is irreplaceable and I am saddened to know that we won't get to enjoy more of her   I love Katy Perry, she is adorable in any weird outfit or cube on her head.  Because her music kicks ass, she can pretty much get away with anything. She only has a couple of songs that make me go WTF was she thinking?  Russell Brand and her make a great couple, they have a perfect mixture of hotness and craziness that can go a long way.
Oh and the MTV house artist, Jessie J, who the fuck is she?  Where did she comes from?  I hear she opened for Katy Perry or something, sometime, somewhere??  I thought she sucked and her cover songs were a disgrace to the original artists.  She had a broken foot and was in this ugly cast thing.  I never understood why she just sat there, I mean I know her leg was stuck in a cast but damn, MTV is rich, they could have had her suspended by something cool or at least on wheels, hover round.... something.  Hopefully next year MTV will step it up and get back to the coolness level that they once had.