Ashton Kutcher on Two and a Half Men?? WTF?? I have an idea though....

So as we all know from past blogs, if you read it..... I am a huge Two and a Half Men fan.  I love the show.  Charlie sheen is crazy,  that is true but he can't be replaced.  CAN'T!!  How the hell are they gonna pull that one off???  I am curious so I will watch just to see but I doubt it will even be close to being as funny as it is with Charlie Sheen.  It did however get me to thinking.  Just for the record, I am an Ashton fan as well,  and he's just goofy looking enough to pull my idea off.  How cool would it be if they had Ashton show up as Charlie's grown and unknown child???  Charlie could freak out and leave to do some thinking and never return.  Then he sends a letter and leaves the house to his new kid and jets to start over on an island of drunken skanks.....  his own personal heaven.  It's a win win.  Alan and the kid can still stay and the drunk womanizing can continue. BAM!!  Your welcome CBS.  

What I have Learned About Relationships with Men. (Still learning)

I am a very happily married woman but it took a lot of bullshit and assholes before I found my prince.  In my opinion, some women need to lower their standards just a little. (I said just a little) don't bring home just any jack ass.  No one is perfect and there will always be something that will irk you about your man.  It's about balance, compromise and communication.  Instead of wasting my time looking for the perfect man, I found a man that is perfect for me!!  Here's my rules that seem to work well for me..... So far.
        In no particular order.

1. CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES.  Some things aren't worth arguing over.  I'd rather just pick the damn clothes off of the floor and put them in the hamper myself then say anything.  I am sure he keeps quite about some of the irritating things I do.
2. IT'S THE LITTLE THINGS THAT REALLY COUNT.  Don't get me wrong, I love gifts and flowers as much as the next girl but I would much rather my husband pick me some fresh flowers than buy me some that took no effort except whipping out the wallet.  It makes me happier than anything when he comes up behind me when I am doing something and he just hugs me.  And kisses on the forehead....  Love them!!
3. COMMUNICATE AND LISTEN.  Always take the time to talk about anything.  It's cool to have your secrets, we all do, but when it comes down to it, I know I can talk to him and that is a refreshing feeling.  We talk about our day, our complaints, our worries and concerns. We always know that we love each other.  Never a doubt.
4. NEVER HAVE THE PAST SEX PARTNER TALK. No explanation needed, the past is the past and as long as both people are STD free.... What the fuck does it matter??  I have no idea how many women my husband slept with before me and I have no reason to care.  Anything that happened before me that doesn't affect our relationship now is a non issue.  And everyone lies anyway so why bother?  Besides, does anyone really want to have that talk??  Hell NO!!
5. MAKE TIME FOR ALONE TIME. (IT'S NECESSARY) I love getting in my car with a fountain cherry coke and loud music and my camel filters and driving with no destination in mind. It clears my head and relieves any stress I may be having.  It is very therapeutic.  My husband goes to visits friends without me and he has his things that make him less stressed out.  Some I would rather not think about.  Ewww.  
6. MAKE TIME FOR EACH OTHER.  Alone time is good but it's always important to make time for each other as well.  I can't count how many concerts my husband has taken me to and he really didn't like the band.  He likes to hike and sweat and shit.  Not my thing but this summer I will be hiking it up sweating tits to do things he likes too.  It's give and take.  
7. HAVE A DATE NIGHT.  Whether it's a fancy place to eat or Burger King in your living room floor on a fake ass make shift picnic table with candles and everything, it is important to eat dinner together and talk.  Maybe even feed each other the sexy stuff.  Do not attempt with Spam.  I tried, there is nothing sexy about coagulated meat product.  
8. HELP EACH OTHER IN EVERYTHING YOU DO.   Any man that will help me use the bathroom because my nails are wet is a winner in my book.  I help him too, if it wasn't for me his nose hairs would have their own area code and let's not even talk about the occasional butt pimple.  He gets mine too.  We make a great team!!
9. BE EACH OTHERS BEST FRIEND.  Self explanatory.  If he's not your best friend..... keep on stepping.  When the looks fade and the wrinkles don't, it's gonna be your conversations and laughter that keep you happy.  Start early.  

EdgeFest 2011 pics

EdgeFest 2011, Seether, Stone Sour, Theory Of a Deadman and more!

 Music!!!

 Drunk girlie talk with my niece.

 Uncle Nick embarrassed of our behavior. lol 

 Beauty runs in our family

 Much Love

 And Peace, or bunny ears!

 My wonderful husband and BFF

 Some say we are weird.  I don't know where they get that idea??

 Kissy Kissy Love

 Some random dudes cool ass shirt.

And nothing like a dude in a tree to make our concert experience complete.

Things I love list

I did a hate list so I guess it's only fair that I complete a love list too.  Just keeping things even around here.  Again.... in no particular order.  (Only because that would require too much thought and I am high).

* Rainbows (colors in the sky without drugs.... SCORE!!!)
* Sticky Notes (Good thing for potheads or forgetful people.) Same difference.
* Toilet Paper (do ya need a reason?)
* Rechargeable batteries (fuck paying for them every time, lazy fuckers, charge them bitches.)
* Iphones (Love it)
* Incense (covers funk or non funk)
* Glitter (a cheating mans worst enemy)
* Animals (they don't judge, lie, cheat, but they will steal your sandwich)
* Flip Flops (as close to barefoot as this hippie can be)
* Ipods (My music when I want.  SCORE!!!!!)
* Things that dangle (think what ya want, you're probably right.)
* Cats (they are some funny motherfuckers)
* Photography (my dream)
* Grand Theft Auto (who doesn't wanna run the fuck over some assholes while jamming out to crazy techno??>>  Exactly.)
* My husband (he is amazing!)
* Notebooks and pens (together they can make magic.)
* Stealing Pens (I'm a addict)
* Magic 8 balls (the deciding factor in many of my sexual encounters, before I was married of course.)
* Roller Derby (bad ass)
* Grocery Carts (imagine carrying all that shit??)
* Text Messaging (maybe I don't want to talk to you)
* Hand Sanitizer (not weird all the time applying it, you people are freaks, some germs are good.)  And you wonder why you're damn kids are sick all the fucking time??>>  Duh, they need some dirt or germs.
* Sports with Violence (I want to see blood!)
* Stealing Random Restaurant Items (only the stuff they expect to get stolen anyway)
* Collecting Shot Glasses
* Velcro (genius)  Laces for lazy people, or dumb asses that can't tie shoes.
* Tattoos (art on bodies?, beautiful.)
* Chap Stick
* Stickers (always cool)
* Shiny and or Sparkly Things
* Quarter Machines (with cool junk in them.)
* Glass Bottle Coke (that stuff is the shit)  I think it has crack in it.
* Balloon Animals (duh, no I am totally easily amused.)
* Cars with Cup-holders
* My Family (Mom's side only)
* Smiling at strangers  (to confuse them mainly)
* Good Movies
* Color Changing Pipes (That other people own)  of course.
* Pink (the color)
* Pink (the artist, she's pretty bad ass too)
* Bic Lighters (hello??  You can wash them and they still work!!)
* Diamonds  (I want a bigger one though.)
* Scoopable Cat Litter  (disappearing poo and pee!!!)  My kind of thing!
* Painting (it's fun to be messy)
* Laser Pointers (just fun)
* Sexy Delivery People (sign where??) lol
* The Loyalty of My Dogs (they love me knowing I'm a fuck up.)
* Hammers (those fuckers are useful)
* Easy Cheese (that's damn near # 1)
* Good Comedy
* Lotion (for dry skin, pervs)
* KY Intense arousal Gel (there you go prevs.)
* Ice Water
* Sweet Tea
* Netflix (movies on demand.... SCORE!!!)
* Men who Manscape  (it's important dudes really)  Besides it makes your junk look bigger.  Not that my man needs it.  In fact, he needs to grow a jungle to hide that trouser snake.
* Concerts
* Good Friends (not fake bitches)
* Blogging  (fun to talk to no one and everyone at the same time.)
* Old Cartoons (foghorn leghorn, the coyote, the good ones!)
* Music (says what you can't sometimes)
* A Good Margarita (patron what??)
* love
* Clicky Ink Pens (screw keeping up with a lid, not my thing.)
* 4 Wheel Drive (makes mud fun.)
* Fountain Sodas (bottle what?)
* Chicklet Gum (yummy)
* Cold Beer
* Converse (classic black)
* Shag Carpet (dirt hides for longer.)
* Hair Ties (totally useful)
* Peanut M&M's  (healthy snack.)  Kinda.

That's all I can think of right off the top of my melon in this mind-state of awesomeness.  
Peace and LOVE to all.